Saturday, November 17, 2012

missing someone

The sad thing about missing someone is we don't even know if that someone misses us too. Well I do really miss you, as always. But I am tired of feeling this pain over and over again. So I am pulling myself back up. And I am sorry but I just want you to know that I still believe in you. Its you I believe and I don't care what other people has to say about you. I don't even care if how many times I get hurt for feeling this way. I am pathetic, guess I am. I have heard that from my best friend and I get that but you're the one who told me to keep it real so I am keeping this real, I like you as in a lot but I know I have to let go of this feeling for the obvious reason. So take care of yourself and if you're gonna do something stupid, sure I will be there to punch you in the face. I will always be your friend not because of the promise we've made but because I want to. :) 

Monday, October 1, 2012


Call me crazy, stupid and dumb but its still you and I still choose you. What happened, happened and so be it. I don't want to pretend anymore that I got over you because honestly I have not. Maybe in time, in time. :) Though I am happy, I chose to be happy. But at the end of the day, I still think about you and its still you. 

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Its better this way.. :)

I have thrown all the quotes/letters i have made for you.
Does this mean that I am really moving forward?
I really hope so. :)

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

If I believed

If I believed - Patti Austin
If I believed in paradise
I'd swear I must be there
I'd swear I must be there right now with you
If I believed in miracles
I'd know that one was happening to me
But if I don't believe in paradise
Then miracles aren't real
Then someone tell me what is this I feel
I wanna believe it's love this time
I wanna believe my heart's not telling me a lie
But with you I can't deny
if I believed in paradise
I'd swear I'm there
If I believed in magic spells
It all would be so clear
'Cause magic spells must have brought you here
If I could see the future
I'd see if you and I were meant to be
But I dont know any magic
And tomorrow's just a dream
But something in this fantasy is real
I wanna believe it's love this time
I wanna believe my heart's not telling me a lie
I wanna believe it's love this time
I wanna believe my heart's not telling me a lie
But with you I cant deny
If I believed in paradise
I'd swear I'm there
I'm there
I'm there
If I believed.

--Listening to this song makes me wanna cry. Especially the chorus part.
Yes, I want to believe that its love and my heart is not telling me a lie.
But sometimes its just so hard to trust my heart after all that has happened.
And I am also not that confident in us anymore :(


So confused and I don't know why. :( 

Friday, August 3, 2012

reward! :)

Omg! Now I am officially broke. :( Just spend around too much on something, hopefully it will be worth it. Then again I have thought about this for so long now and besides I have worked hard on the past few weeks, so its time for me to reward myself. yey!

Friday, July 13, 2012


There is this line from a song of "My Jason" that goes something like this "I'm gonna keep on hopin' that one day you'll be mine.. ". Looking back at the phrase, how i wish i can keep on hoping but for me its the opposite. I am not hoping anymore or shall i say I dont want to hope anymore.. so the line for me goes something like this "I'm gonna keep on hopin' that one day I will be completely over you." You're making it so hard for me and I just can't tell you that, so I want this so called "us" (though in reality there is no really us just you and me) be over and done. 

Monday, June 25, 2012


There comes a point in your life that you really miss someone so much and all you can do is just let go of whatever that has been. 
I am letting go of whatever this is. I am not saying that I don't like you anymore, because I still do. Its just that I am letting go of this feeling now. 

Monday, June 18, 2012


Yes I like you! I really do and its no concern of yours.I just like you and its my choice to like you.Whether you feel the same way or not, I would still choose to like you. I have always liked you and will always will. I am not expecting you to reciprocate this feeling, let me just like you the way I know how. What I have told you and what you've told me, I guess changed something to whatever we have now. 

Tuesday, May 22, 2012


I never regretted telling you I liked you, I only regretted never hearing what you really thought of me.

Saturday, April 28, 2012

atik ra!

The road seems to lead me back to you.. 
I don't understand why.. 
Maybe because you are my greatest what if.. 
Really need to talk this out and make things clear. :)

Saturday, April 7, 2012


I think about you a lot lately
I even think about you at work
Worst that I even wish its me 
You think about each day


How I wish we held hands
How I wish you hugged me tight
But they are all just wishes 
In this stupid heart of mine

Thursday, April 5, 2012

when sadness takes over your whole being..

You know how hard it is to know that you can't do something for the people who matter so much to you because you're so far from them.. even if you want to do something for the situation but you just can't.. how i wish i'm in my homeland now.. :( 

Tuesday, March 20, 2012


I wondered what it was..
I even wondered why it happened..
I am wondering what is this..

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Next destination =)

I badly need to travel and be away from these thoughts of you.. :(
So im choosing dubai as the destination to conquer.. yey!
See u soon best!